Breast feeding my daughter has been an eventful roller coaster, one that I wanted to get off of right away. The first big drop was when she stopped taking the breast entirely. This happened when we went to pick her up from her stint in the hospital tanning beds. We started our ascent again when we were shown how to use a Supplemental Nutrition System (SNS). That led to a smaller drop on the roller coaster track and a tight curve because it wouldn't work for us. Andrew had a hard time getting the SNS in next to my nipple, and there wasn't enough milk in the syringe to actually supplement my milk supply. Next came the corkscrew of the roller coaster, my milk supply. Ayla wasn't getting enough to eat at my breast, so I had to work hard with the pumps that I had to train my breasts to create more milk. These corkscrews lasted for almost two weeks, some pumps would give me more milk, others would give me much less. I just now am producing half of what she wants, and this is a huge increase! Then comes the loop-de-loop of this roller coaster, the nipple shield. At first it seemed like a blessing because Ayla would go to my breast and NOT scream, but soon enough I realized that it wasn't what I wanted. I then tried to transition her to my breast, which was an epic fail.
After the epic fail transitioning her back to my breast from the nipple shield, I called Baby Moon, and finally the roller coaster started to mellow out, and we were sliding into the unloading dock. I don't know what it was, but somehow they got Ayla to a point where she realized that milk was coming from my breasts! Now I can latch her on, and we are headed to a kiddy coaster with this adventure.
The first bump of the kiddy coaster is extreme nipple discomfort. I thought she wasn't latching on right, and that was the first drop of the kiddy coaster, but the next upward swing occurred yesterday when Sonja at Baby Moon told me that everything looks fine, and that it is probably her tongue that's causing the chafing on my nipple. I see the end of the kiddy coaster ride approaching, and I am waiting expectantly, with my pump in one hand (to keep my milk supply up by pumping after feedings) and my nipple balm in the other (to help repair my poor nipples).
These roller coaster rides have been the most stressful rides of my life. I wanted to jump off the coaster, mid drop, at times. Other times I wanted to ride it out and just stay where I was, not caring if the ride ever ended. I cried, more than I want to admit; I screamed, sometimes getting upset with Ayla for not cooperating; and worst of all, I gave up on multiple occasions. I got really frustrated with everyone telling me that it will take time, and to be patient, mainly because I didn't feel like I had time to waste, because if I waited too long then my milk would never come in, and I'd never breast feed my little girl (and this was super important to me).
Now we have a plan. I offer my breast every other feeding (because every three hours is too much on my nipples at this point), Ayla's food supply is supplemented with pumped milk or formula using the SNS and a pinkie finger, and we have tongue exercises to do with Ayla to get her tongue moving correctly during breast feeding. My baby is getting enough food, and I'm breast feeding, which is the healthiest thing for both of us.
Hurray for the ladies of Baby Moon! I will forever be indebted to them for all they have done for my family.
No comments:
Post a Comment